1. If a French person responds “no" to whatever question you
may ask, it is by no means definitive. It’s merely the easiest way of them
telling you that they're indifferent, and a mellow joke or clever excuse will
almost always cheer them into a “yes” mood. *this applies to 95% of situations
2. If you don’t know what’s being served for lunch at the canteen, or you're having trouble reading the menu at any traditional French restaurant, it’s a safe bet to look around, find someone with food who looks reasonably intelligent, point at them and just ask for the “meme chose” or the same thing. This doesn't always work but at least you'll have someone to blame
3. Working 35 hours a week doesn’t mean you’re lazy, it means that you work more efficiently than those who work more to finish the same amount of work in less time and have thus well earned your right to 40 days of paid vacation per year.
4. If while dining at a restaurant, your waiter asks you what you’d like to eat and you fail to respond with some sort of affirmation, you just likely cornered yourself into a three-hour dining affair. At least now you have all of the time you like to make up your mind. The waiter will return only once you seek him out or make eye contact.
5. If everyone around you is running to catch the next metro while you’re being introduced to a French female, you should still always give them the bisous (kiss them) before running off with the crowd.
6. It is our god-given right to strike, no matter the reason. It’s best to make sure that there is actually slightest hint of a conceivable reason and that your employer knows ahead of time. Either way, your job is secure.
7. As with most any job contract in France, the weatherman’s contract is indefinite. He will not lose his job for failing to predict the weather correctly, day after day after day. “You can’t predict the future, simply look outside, that’s the weather” – the friendly words of your local meteorologist
8. Food culture in France is as big if not bigger than sports culture in the US. Eating by yourself is like playing catch by yourself: impractical. Eating a 30-minute meal is like playing a 1-set tennis match: illogical. Finally, not eating every part of a pristine animal is like crushing an opponent without letting your benchwarmers in the game: immoral.
9. When a French person tells you they don't have Christmas lights, it's not because they don't celebrate the holidays. It just doesn't make any sense to pay for Christmas lights when you can save the money to spend on Christmas food.
10. Waiting your turn in line is a choice, not an obligation. Whoever gets to the front of the line first has merely assumed the right a way.
2. If you don’t know what’s being served for lunch at the canteen, or you're having trouble reading the menu at any traditional French restaurant, it’s a safe bet to look around, find someone with food who looks reasonably intelligent, point at them and just ask for the “meme chose” or the same thing. This doesn't always work but at least you'll have someone to blame
3. Working 35 hours a week doesn’t mean you’re lazy, it means that you work more efficiently than those who work more to finish the same amount of work in less time and have thus well earned your right to 40 days of paid vacation per year.
4. If while dining at a restaurant, your waiter asks you what you’d like to eat and you fail to respond with some sort of affirmation, you just likely cornered yourself into a three-hour dining affair. At least now you have all of the time you like to make up your mind. The waiter will return only once you seek him out or make eye contact.
5. If everyone around you is running to catch the next metro while you’re being introduced to a French female, you should still always give them the bisous (kiss them) before running off with the crowd.
6. It is our god-given right to strike, no matter the reason. It’s best to make sure that there is actually slightest hint of a conceivable reason and that your employer knows ahead of time. Either way, your job is secure.
7. As with most any job contract in France, the weatherman’s contract is indefinite. He will not lose his job for failing to predict the weather correctly, day after day after day. “You can’t predict the future, simply look outside, that’s the weather” – the friendly words of your local meteorologist
8. Food culture in France is as big if not bigger than sports culture in the US. Eating by yourself is like playing catch by yourself: impractical. Eating a 30-minute meal is like playing a 1-set tennis match: illogical. Finally, not eating every part of a pristine animal is like crushing an opponent without letting your benchwarmers in the game: immoral.
9. When a French person tells you they don't have Christmas lights, it's not because they don't celebrate the holidays. It just doesn't make any sense to pay for Christmas lights when you can save the money to spend on Christmas food.
10. Waiting your turn in line is a choice, not an obligation. Whoever gets to the front of the line first has merely assumed the right a way.
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